today i shot a gun at the moon
and it spoke or it cried
i talked to everyone i have ever known
in the space of a second
and i wasn't crying life is so great
do you know how it feels to be shot in the face
i know i know
guns don't kill people
but bullets do
and so does puffer fish improperly cooked
and drunk drivers kill people
and angry mobs kill people
and house fires kill people
and sometimes your heart fails
because you took too many drugs
or maybe an airplane fell on your head
yeah that can be lethal too
remember that one time i died
when i was on the moon
there was no air and i tried to say
i need air! i am a human!
and if you had been there
you wouldn't have heard me
you may have seen my mouth make the words
and have thought i said "i eat hair! shining cubans!"
and felt confused and lost
and i think that's how it feels to stand
in the middle of a room
trying to become the carpet
i know i know!
get to the point already!
stop changing subjects!
but the point is that we are protected from space
by a thin layer of atmosphere
and then there is a lot of nothing up there
and down here there is something
but we are always under nothing and sometimes
i want to sell religion to the lost
in the form of breathing into a plastic bag
and selling breath to the breathless
if i feel bad about this or anything else
i think to myself:
beneath me is a huge fucking pool of lava!
i am walking on it!
i am a huge badass!
and sometimes it works
and sometimes not so much